Sunday, October 8, 2017

How to Install a Towel Rack in the Bathroom When You Have ADHD:

Buy the towel rack and place it on the stairs so that you will not forget to install it in the coming weeks. Avoid breaking your neck by using care when stepping over it for approximately five weeks. On the day when you plan to re-vamp and organize every drawer in your house, decide that this must be the day and the hour on which the towel rack is to be installed. Examine the wall under the window which is to be the site of installation. Decide that the current dusty curtains are too long and would be instantly torn down when a child tries to shove the towel AND the curtains into the rack. Remove the curtains and toss them unceremoniously aside to be picked up in a few weeks. Rummage through the drawers and totes of fabric in the basement that you have collected that used to belong to every deceased seamstress in the county whose relatives have sold her cache at yard sales and Church bazaars over over the past twenty years. Pick out THE slipperiest, most difficult, least iron-able fabric with which to work. Not to mention the ugliest. Set up the ironing board and examine the iron. Find the son who told you last week that he had unintentionally ruined your iron by ironing something melty and ascertain that he had in fact cleaned the iron as you had asked. Gasp in surprise at this revelation. Make a pot of coffee. Shove the laundry aside to carve out a place to sit on the couch and clean off the coffee table so you can place the sewing machine on a flat surface. Spend twice as long as you would have spent if you had picked cotton fabric, and make some passable yet unattractive curtains. Realize that you are 2 1/2 hours past lunch and make some lunch. Put off installing the towel rack until after lunch. Make ridiculous facebook post, search for the stud-finder and other necessary tools and then install towel rack per instructions. Walk past the sewing machine for a month or so or until you finally get a chance to put it away.
Addendum * skip the part about instructions because you don't read instructions.

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